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 A Worship of Writers

A Lexicon by

By Nelson Handel

 

 

A flock of sheep, a gaggle of geese, a pride of lions, a pack of dogs- we traditionally describe aggregations of animals with phrases like these, known variously as nouns of assemblage, company terms, collective nouns (a misnomer), or terms of venery. This last appellation, embracing the archaic meaning of venery as "the art of the hunt," was coined in our time by James Lipton, most widely known as the unctuous host of the Bravo Network's Inside the Actor's Studio but also the author of An Exaltation of Larks, a loving paean to the appellation of groups. Terms of venery, Lipton suggests, properly evokes their origin in the hunting lexicon of 15th-century England.

A parliament of owls, a leap of leopards; the first outbreak of venereal terms (the adjectival form played with tongue in cheek) appeared in the so-called Books of Courtesy, social primers which strove to codify manners at court. The definitive tome, and the one from which most modern lists descend is The Book of St. Albans, published in 1486, just a few years after William Caxton introduced the printing press to England. "That's how important it was," says Lipton. "Betraying ignorance of the language of the hunt would brand the offending courtier as a rube."

The St. Albans catalogue was not limited to "Beestys and Fowlys," bipeds and common objects fell victim to venereal subtleties as well. Hence an eloquence of lawyers, a flight of stairs, and yes, a worship of writers (so coined for the deference they historically showed to their patrons rather than, unfortunately, the reverse) also appear there.

Though indexed in St. Albans, inventing these terms was a logophile's game, an amusement open to all with a desire to capture the poetry, humor, and intrinsic nature of a group. Since the peculiar denizens that roam the social forests of Los Angeles often seem gripped by a "herd" mentality, perhaps the beginning of our own list is in order. As seed, I offer:

A smarm of publicists
A lot of real estate agents
A flash of paparazzi
An idyll of teamsters
A bunch of Rose Queens
A reduction of celebrity chefs
A swell of surfers
An implant of Playboy
bunnies
A press of record executives
A position of yoga instructors
A flicker of "It" girls
A web of digerati
A Valley of porn stars
A schmooze of producers
A silo of aerospace engineers
and, with apologies to USC, A packet of Trojans.

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